Thank you

The past few weeks have been some of tremendous ups and downs. It is amazing how when you are in trouble, people seem to come out of the woodwork to show you they care about you.

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My heart goes out to each of you who have helped me throughout probably the hardest time in my life. Thank you to those who dropped everything to come to my home when I was in need, for the continuous calls and texts, thank you for letting me talk about things, happy and sad, thank you for taking time out of your day, and time off work to come to the viewing and funeral. You still have no idea how much that meant to me. Thank you for my unexpected pack of visitors, you really helped get my mind off things. I want to say thank you to my ward sisters for their continued love and concern. I truly have some of the best friends in the universe. I am afraid to list names in case I forget someone. But you all know who you are.

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I also want to tell you, I really am ok. My heart doesn't quite know what to do with itself at this point, but ya know...that is ok. I don't expect it to for a little while. I know that things will be alright in their due time. To be honest. I have never been so close to the spirit for so long before. When you are at EFY, you are constantly close to the spirit, but this was different. I haven't listened to the radio for 2 weeks -- I have only listened to EFY cd's and LDS artist cd's. I have never prayed to my Heavenly Father more. I have a testimony that He does hear us and comfort us. It is amazing how turning to the Lord can really lift your burdens. "I will not leave you comfortless, I will come to you." John 14:18.

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In all honesty, I still miss Keltson. That I don't think will ever change. But I have the comfort of the gospel and the knowledge that I know exactly what he is doing! He is helping people, like he always has! I wish you all could have seen his funeral and viewing!! 2 hours in a line at the viewing, and the funeral looked like stake conference! That is a lot of people one man can touch and influence in just 19 years Don't you think?? And if you think about it in this light, it is only....assuming we pass on in our mid to upper 80's....it is only 6 decades before we see those who have passed on before us. What a comfort this thought has been to me the past couple weeks.

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Again, thank you for your continued love and support through all of this. Heavenly Father truly has blessed me with tremendous people.

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This is something I just started writting in my philosophy class yesterday. I wasn't even really thinking of anything, but somhow this got on paper.

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His mercy immeasurable,

The day coming where I will kneel at His feet.

Comfort and security to feel as I embrace His hug.

How I long for that day,

When all this destruction can be put aside.

When the gates of heaven open

and the throng of smiling faces beam

with excitement and love.

Those faces from so long ago,

now become familiar,

as if my time on earth was only the turn of the head.

Who cares at this point.

I am back in the presence of those I love.

Returned to my Father

with now only minor dents and scratches.

Finally........

home.